उसे आईलाइनर पसंद था

उसे आईलाइनर पसंद था,
मुझे काजल।

वो फ्रेंच टोस्ट और कॉफी पे मरती थी,
और मैं अदरक की चाय पे।

उसे नाइट क्लब पसंद थे,
मुझे रात की शांत सड़कें।

शांत लोग मरे हुए लगते थे उसे,
मुझे शांत रहकर उसे सुनना पसंद था।

लेखक बोरिंग लगते थे उसे,
पर मुझे मिनटों देखा करती जब मैं लिखता।

वो न्यूयॉर्क के टाइम्स स्कवायर, इस्तांबुल के ग्रैंड बाजार में शॉपिंग के सपने देखती थी,
मैं असम के चाय के बागानों में खोना चाहता था।
मसूरी के लाल डिब्बे में बैठकर सूरज डूबना देखना चाहता था।

उसकी बातों में महँगे शहर थे,
और मेरा तो पूरा शहर ही वो।

न मैंने उसे बदलना चाहा न उसने मुझे।
एक अरसा हुआ दोनों को रिश्ते से आगे बढ़े।

कुछ दिन पहले उनके साथ रहने वाली एक दोस्त से पता चला,
वो अब शांत रहने लगी है,
लिखने लगी है,
मसूरी भी घूम आई,
लाल डिब्बे पर अँधेरे तक बैठी रही।
आधी रात को अचानक से उनका मन
अब चाय पीने को करता है।

और मैं...

मैं भी अब अक्सर कॉफी पी लेता हूँ
किसी महँगी जगह बैठकर।

- गुलज़ार

It's never too late to start all over

At age 5 his Father died.

At age 16 he quit school.

At age 17 he had already lost four jobs.

At age 18 he got married.

Between ages 18 and 22, he was a railroad conductor and failed.

He joined the army and washed out there.

He applied for law school he was rejected.

He became an insurance sales man and failed again.

At age 19 he became a father.

At age 20 his wife left him and took their baby daughter.

He became a cook and dishwasher in a small cafe.

He failed in an attempt to kidnap his own daughter, and eventually he convinced his wife to return home.

At age 65 he retired.

On the 1st day of retirement he received a cheque from the Government for $105.

He felt that the Government was saying that he couldn’t provide for himself.

He decided to commit suicide, it wasn’t worth living anymore; he had failed so much.

He sat under a tree writing his will, but instead, he wrote what he would have accomplished with his life. He realised there was much more that he hadn’t done. There was one thing he could do better than anyone he knew. And that was how to cook.

So he borrowed $87 against his cheque and bought and fried up some chicken using his recipe, and went door to door to sell them to his neighbours in Kentucky.

Remember at age 65 he was ready to commit suicide.

But at age 88 Colonel Sanders, founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) Empire was a billionaire.

Moral of the story: Attitude. It's never too late to start all over.

MOST IMPORTANLY, IT'S ALL ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE. NEVER GIVE UP NO MATTER HOW HARD IT GETS.

You have what it takes to be successful. Go for it and make a difference...... Forwarded as received.

5 रोचक कानूनी ज्ञान

हमारेे देश में कानूनन कुछ ऐसी हकीक़तें है, जिसकी जानकारी हमारे पास नहीं होने के कारण  हम अपने अधिकार से मेहरूम रह जाते है।

तो चलिए ऐसे ही कुछ  *5 रोचक फैक्ट्स* की जानकारी आपको देते है, जो जीवन में कभी भी उपयोगी हो सकती है.

👁‍🗨 *1.  शाम के वक्त महिलाओं की गिरफ्तारी नहीं हो सकती*-

कोड ऑफ़ क्रिमिनल प्रोसीजर, सेक्शन 46 के तहत शाम 6 बजे के बाद और सुबह 6 के पहले भारतीय पुलिस किसी भी महिला को गिरफ्तार नहीं कर सकती, फिर चाहे गुनाह कितना भी संगीन क्यों ना हो. अगर पुलिस ऐसा करते हुए पाई जाती है तो गिरफ्तार करने वाले पुलिस अधिकारी के खिलाफ शिकायत (मामला) दर्ज की जा सकती है. इससे उस पुलिस अधिकारी की नौकरी खतरे में आ सकती है.

👁‍🗨 *2. सिलेंडर फटने से जान-माल के नुकसान पर 40 लाख रूपये तक का बीमा कवर क्लेम कर सकते है*-

पब्लिक लायबिलिटी पॉलिसी के तहत अगर किसी कारण आपके घर में सिलेंडर फट जाता है और आपको जान-माल का नुकसान झेलना पड़ता है तो आप तुरंत गैस कंपनी से बीमा कवर क्लेम कर सकते है. आपको बता दे कि गैस कंपनी से 40 लाख रूपये तक का बीमा क्लेम कराया जा सकता है. अगर कंपनी आपका क्लेम देने से मना करती है या टालती है तो इसकी शिकायत की जा सकती है. दोषी पाये जाने पर गैस कंपनी का लायसेंस रद्द हो सकता है.

👁‍🗨 *3. कोई भी हॉटेल चाहे वो 5 स्टार ही क्यों ना हो… आप फ्री में पानी पी सकते है और वाश रूम इस्तमाल कर सकते है*-

इंडियन सीरीज एक्ट, 1887 के अनुसार आप देश के किसी भी हॉटेल में जाकर पानी मांगकर पी सकते है और उस हॉटल का वाश रूम भी इस्तमाल कर सकते है. हॉटेल छोटा हो या 5 स्टार, वो आपको रोक नही सकते. अगर हॉटेल का मालिक या कोई कर्मचारी आपको पानी पिलाने से या वाश रूम इस्तमाल करने से रोकता है तो आप उन पर कारवाई  कर सकते है. आपकी शिकायत से उस हॉटेल का लायसेंस रद्द हो सकता है.

👁‍🗨 *4. गर्भवती महिलाओं को नौकरी से नहीं निकाला जा सकता*-

मैटरनिटी बेनिफिट एक्ट 1961 के मुताबिक़ गर्भवती महिलाओं को अचानक नौकरी से नहीं निकाला जा सकता. मालिक को पहले तीन महीने की नोटिस देनी होगी और प्रेगनेंसी के दौरान लगने वाले खर्चे का कुछ हिस्सा देना होगा. अगर वो ऐसा नहीं करता है तो  उसके खिलाफ सरकारी रोज़गार संघटना में शिकायत कराई जा सकती है. इस शिकायत से कंपनी बंद हो सकती है या कंपनी को जुर्माना भरना पड़ सकता है.

👁‍🗨 *5. पुलिस अफसर आपकी शिकायत लिखने से मना नहीं कर सकता*-

आईपीसी के सेक्शन 166ए के अनुसार कोई भी पुलिस अधिकारी आपकी कोई भी शिकायत दर्ज करने से इंकार नही कर सकता. अगर वो ऐसा करता है तो उसके खिलाफ वरिष्ठ पुलिस दफ्तर में शिकायत दर्ज कराई जा सकती है. अगर वो पुलिस अफसर दोषी पाया जाता है तो उसे कम से कम 6 महीने से लेकर 1  साल तक की जेल हो सकती है या फिर उसे अपनी नौकरी गवानी पड़ सकती है.

इन रोचक फैक्ट्स को हमने आपके लिए ढूंढ निकाला है.

ये वो रोचक फैक्ट्स है, जो हमारे देश के कानून के अंतर्गत आते तो है पर हम इनसे अंजान है. हमारी कोशिश होगी कि हम आगे भी ऐसी बहोत सी रोचक बाते आपके समक्ष रखे, जो आपके जीवन में उपयोगी हो।

जहाँ खामोश रहना है वहाँ मुँह खोल जाते हैं

कहाँ पर बोलना है और कहाँ पर बोल जाते हैं
जहाँ खामोश रहना है वहाँ मुँह खोल जाते हैं

*कटा जब शीश सैनिक का तो हम खामोश रहते हैं
कटा एक सीन पिक्चर का तो सारे बोल जाते हैं*

ये कुर्सी मुल्क खा जाए तो कोई कुछ नही कहता
मगर रोटी की चोरी हो तो सारे बोल जाते हैं

*नयी नस्लों के ये बच्चे जमाने भर की सुनते हैं
मगर माँ बाप कुछ बोले तो बच्चे बोल जाते है*

फसल बर्बाद होती है तो कोई कुछ नही कहता
किसी की भैंस चोरी हो तो सारे बोल जाते हैं

*बहुत ऊँची दुकानो मे कटाते जेब सब अपनी
मगर मजदूर माँगेगा तो सिक्के बोल जाते हैं*

गरीबों के घरों की बेटियाँ अब तक कुँवारी हैं
कि रिश्ता कैसे होगा जबकि गहने बोल जाते हैं

अगर मखमल करे गलती तो कोई कुछ नही कहता
फटी चादर की गलती हो तो सारे बोल जाते हैं

हवाओं की तबाही को सभी चुपचाप सहते हैं
च़रागों से हुई गलती तो सारे बोल जाते हैं

बनाते फिरते हैं रिश्ते जमाने भर से हम अक्सर
मगर घर मे जरूरत हो तो रिश्ते बोल जाते हैं.

Stanford University

A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun suit walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.
"We want to see the President” the man said softly.
"He'll be busy all day” the secretary snapped.
"We'll wait" the lady replied.
For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president.
"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave" she said to him. The President, stern faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple.
The lady told him "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed. My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus."
The president wasn't touched....He was shocked. "Madam " he said, gruffly," we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery."
"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, and then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard."
For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he could get rid of them now. The lady turned to her husband and said quietly, “Is that all it costs to start a university ? Why don't we just start our own?" Her husband nodded.
The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment. Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established the University that bears their name. Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
Most of the time we judge people by their outer appearance, which can be misleading.. And in this impression, we tend to treat people badly by thinking they can do nothing for us. Thus we tend to lose our potential good friends, employees or customers.
Remember:
In our Life, we seldom get people with whom we want to share & grow our thought process. But because of our inner EGO we miss them forever.

India - is it a gigantic success or a colossal failure?

Kishore Rajani: An introductory 5 minutes speech given in London at a event, by a young professional of Indian origin. His name Dhritiman  Biswas. He spoke extempore and the points are reproduced here. The topic was  a round table on: 'India -  is it a gigantic success or a colossal failure?'
This is what he said:
 "Ladies and Gentleman, I am glad I am merely introducing the debate and not participating as in my humble opinion the question itself is wrong. India, unlike, many western paradigms cannot be analysed in black and white.. in linear equations or algorithms such as this.... We hate test cricket yet are the No1 test ranked country; our ranking in gender diversity is 134, yet the majority of our bank CEOs, the most misogynist yet of industries are women; our health services creak and crumble, yet 36 pct of all NHS consultants are Indians; we love Bollywood tamasha, yet New York philharmonic sold out in 5 minutes in Calcutta in 1984; we struggle with illiteracy, yet are the largest English speaking country in the world; we riot, fight and squabble, yet remain a thriving democracy whilst Russia, Arabia, Brazil, Pakistan fall to authoritarianism...India is a concept devised by the British and therefore in many ways a contradiction, a process , a work in progress. Our poverty index suggests we are a hopeless failure, our mobile usage however may allude to resounding success. Our private sector defaults diabolically like Kingfisher but spectacularly turnaround JLR like TATA. This question cannot be answered because it is the wrong question to ask. The right question is - can India be allowed to fail?  JP Morgan elegantly points to the ruins of emerging markets and says India is a nice house in a bad street! I would add further... The western world is founded on the principles of liberal, free market, democracy... Outside the OECD and the western Anglo Saxon Protestant world, literally in the entire globe there is one other example of this experiment and that is India...we are the West and England's most natural ally... We speak the language, sing Beatles songs, read Wodehouse and want to grow up to be Sherlock. Despite our many failings we are a giant and a colossus and for the sake of the world let's hope we succeed."

शेयर मार्केट में पैसा कैसे डूबता है ?

एक बार एक आदमी ने गाँव वालों से कहा कि वो 100 रु. में एक बन्दर 🐒 खरीदेगा, ये सुनकर सभी गाँव वाले नजदीकी जंगल की ओर दौड़ पड़े और वहां से बन्दर पकड़ पकड़ कर 100 रु. में उस आदमी को बेचने लगे ..
कुछ दिन बाद ये सिलसिला कम हो गया और लोगों की इस बात में दिलचस्पी कम हो गयी .......

फिर उस आदमी ने कहा की वो एक एक 🐒बन्दर के लिए 200 रु. देगा, ये सुनकर लोग फिर बन्दर 🐒 पकड़ने में
लग गये। लेकिन कुछ दिन बाद मामला फिर ठंडा हो गया .

अब उस आदमी ने कहा कि वो बंदरों के लिए 500 रु. देगा, लेकिन क्यूंकि उसे शहर जाना था, उसने इस काम के
लिए एक असिस्टेंट नियुक्त कर दिया. 500 रु. सुनकर गाँव वाले बदहवास हो गए, लेकिन पहले ही लगभग सारे बन्दर पकड़े जा चुके थे इसलिए उन्हें कोई हाथ नहीं लगा ......।

तब उस आदमी का असिस्टेंट उनसे आकर कहता है,
"आप लोग चाहें तो सर के पिंजरे में से 400 -400 रु. में बन्दर 🐒 खरीद सकते हैं, जब सर आ जाएँ तो 500-500 में बेच दीजियेगा।" गाँव वालों को ये प्रस्ताव भा गया और उन्होंने (100-200 रु. में बेचे हुए) सारे बन्दर 🐒 400 - 400 रु. में खरीद लिए ।
अगले दिन न वहां कोई असिस्टेंट था और न ही कोई सर।
बस बन्दर ही बन्दर..

एक ही विषय पर 6 महान शायरों का नजरिया...

1- मिर्ज़ा ग़ालिब :

"शराब पीने दे मस्जिद में बैठ कर,
या वो जगह बता जहाँ ख़ुदा नहीं।"

2- इक़बाल:

"मस्जिद ख़ुदा का घर है, पीने की जगह नहीं ,
काफिर के दिल में जा, वहाँ ख़ुदा नहीं।"

3- अहमद फ़राज़:

काफिर के दिल से आया हूँ मैं ये देख कर, खुदा मौजूद है वहाँ, पर उसे पता नहीं।"

4- वसी :

खुदा तो मौजूद दुनिया में हर जगह है,
तू जन्नत में जा वहाँ पीना मना नहीं।"

5- साकी:

"पीता हूँ ग़म-ए-दुनिया भुलाने के लिए,
जन्नत में कौन सा ग़म है इसलिए वहाँ पीने में मजा नही।"

 6 -व्हाटसअप एडमिन:

ला भाई दारू पिला, बकवास न बांचो ..
जहाँ मर्ज़ी वही पिएंगे, भाड़ में जाएँ पांचों"

9 short stories worth reading

1. FALL and RISE
 
Today, when I slipped on the wet tile floor a boy in a wheelchair caught me before I slammed my head on the ground.  He said, “Believe it or not, that’s almost exactly how I injured my back 3 years ago .

2. A FATHER'S ADVICE

Today, my father told me, “Just go for it and give it a try!  You don’t have to be a professional to build a successful product.  Amateurs started Google and Apple.  Professionals built the Titanic

3. The POWER of UNIQUENESS .

Today, I asked my mentor – a very successful business man in his 70’s – what his top 3 tips are for success.  He smiled and said, “Read something no one else is reading, think something no one else is thinking, and do something no one else is doing.

4. LOOKING BACK

Today, I interviewed my grandmother for part of a research paper I’m working on for my Psychology class.  When I asked her to define success in her own words, she said, “Success is when you look back at your life and the memories make you smile.

5. TRY and YOU shall KNOW

I am blind by birth. When I was 8 years old, I wanted to play baseball. I asked my father- "Dad, can I play baseball?" He said "You'll never know until you try." When I was a teenager, I asked him, - "Dad Can I become a surgeon?". He replied "Son, you'll never know until you try." Today I am a Surgeon, just because I tried!

6. GOODNESS & GRATITUDE

Today, after a 72 hour shift at the fire station, a woman ran up to me at the grocery store and gave me a hug.  When I tensed up, she realized I didn’t recognize her.  She let go with tears of joy in her eyes and the most sincere smile and said, “On 9-11-2001, you carried me out of world trade centre.
 

7. LOOKING BACK

Today, as my father, three brothers, and two sisters stood around my mother’s hospital bed, my mother uttered her last coherent words before she died. She simply said, “I feel so loved right now. We should have gotten together like this more often.”

8. AFFECTION

Today, I kissed my dad on the forehead as he passed away in a small hospital bed.  About 5 seconds after he passed, I realized it was the first time I had given him a kiss since I was a little boy.



9. SHARING

Today, I was traveling in Kenya and I met a refugee from Zimbabwe.  He said he hadn’t eaten anything in over 3 days and looked extremely skinny and unhealthy.  Then my friend offered him the rest of the sandwich he was eating.  The first thing the man said was, “We can share it.”

Cheers to life😃😊😊

One of the best posts, ever gone through.....thanks to all those who decided to share these real life experiences

10 English words used only by Indians since childhood days....

1. Mother Promise

For ages, you have always used this word without even knowing if it was a legit word, haven't you? So we decided to burst your bubble! While the word 'promise' features in the Oxford Dictionary, there's no mention of 'mother promise'. Surprised? Wondering how 'mother promise' came into being. It's the literal English translation of 'ma kasam' or 'aai shapath'. The next time you want to stand by something you really mean, try using just 'promise'. You don't really need to drag your mother into everything, do you?

2. Cousin sister and cousin brother

According to the Oxford Dictionary a 'cousin' is a child of one's uncle or aunt. And Grammar Nazis would insist that the word 'cousin' does not need to be followed with words like 'sister' or 'brother'. Did you know that 'cousin sister or cousin brother' are words used only in India. The right way is just to say 'cousin'. Wondering how you'd get to know their gender. Well, that's what names are for, aren't they?

3. Good name

When Indians meet strangers, why do they ask the question, 'What's your GOOD NAME?' Every parent or grandparent who has named the child, does it with a GOOD intention. So there's nothing bad about a name. The next time you meet a stranger, you could say 'What's your name?'

4. Revert back

Now this one's tricky! Because that's what you have been writing in e-mails, haven't you? Well according to The Free Dictionary 'revert' means 'to reply to someone'. Why use 'revert back' when you can just say 'revert'?

5.  Rubber

In India the 'eraser' is also called 'rubber'! But in the rest of the world, 'rubber' is a slang for 'condom'. Now it makes sense why your relatives and friends in foreign countries complain that people there burst out laughing when they ask for a 'rubber' instead of an 'eraser'.

6. Picture

When was the last time you mentioned that you were going to 'watch a 'picture'?' No one really knows when 'picture' became synonymous with 'films' or 'movies' in India. According to the Oxford Dictionary, 'picture' means a drawing or painting. You could say 'I am going out to watch a movie or film'.

7. Mention not

Isn't it funny that every time someone thanks an Indian, they quickly turn around and say 'mention not'. We are still scratching our heads wondering how the word originated and what it means. There are plenty of ways you can accept someone's thanks.You can use any of the following:

You're welcome.
It's my pleasure.
That's alright.
No problem.

8. Pass out

How is it that every Indian graduating from college is passing out? Confused? Let's tell you the difference. When you are really drunk and become unconscious, you 'pass out'. But when you refer to a successful completion of a course or training, you use the word 'graduate'.

9. Cheatercock

We all have used this word in our childhood. Once, twice, thrice…we have lost count of the number of times we called someone a 'cheatercock'! But ever wondered what does the word mean? We are still wondering! According to the Oxford Dictionary, cheater is a person who acts dishonestly in order to gain advantage. Won't it be sufficient if we just said 'cheater'?

10. Would be

How would you introduce your fiance?

Amit: Hello uncle.

Uncle: Hello Amit.

Amit: Uncle, I would like to introduce you to my 'would be'.

Unfortunately Amit doesn't know that 'would be' means nothing. If you want to introduce your to-be bride then simply use 'fiance'. How easy is that!

Kaizen Story: Tiger in the Toilet

Once a stranded Tiger entered the washroom in a Corporate Office and hid in a dark corner. Since there were people outside the washroom through the day, the Tiger was afraid to come out.

Many people frequented the washroom, but the frightened Tiger didn’t touch anyone. However, after four days it couldn’t bear hunger anymore, so it caught a man who had come in, and ate him.

This man happened to be an Assistant General Manager in the organization, but nobody noticed his disappearance.

Since nothing untoward happened, the Tiger became bolder and after two days caught another man and ate him.

This man was the General Manager of the organization.

Still, nobody worried over his disappearance (Some people even happy that he was not seen in the office).

Next day, the Tiger caught the Vice President who was a terror in the organization.

Again nothing happened. The Tiger was very happy and decided that this was the perfect place for him to live.

The very next day the happy Tiger caught a man who had entered the washroom while balancing a tray of teacups in one hand.

The frightened man fell unconscious. Within fifteen minutes a huge hue and cry ensued, and everyone in the office started looking for the man. The search team reached the washroom, flushed out the Tiger and saved the unconscious man. He was the tea boy in the office.

Moral of the Story

It is not the position, but our usefulness to others that makes us lovable and respectable.

Acknowledgement: From the book Tiger in the Toilet

The 90/10 principle

The 90/10 principle

I am sharing this article by Stephen Covey

I hope you Enjoy it

Discover the 90/10 Principle

It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations)

What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you

90% of life is decided by how you react

What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us

We cannot stop the car from breaking down

The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off

A driver may cut us off in traffic

We have no control over this 10%

The other 90% is different

You determine the other 90%

How? ……….By your reaction

You cannot control a red light but you can control your reaction

Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react

Let's use an example

You are eating breakfast with your family

Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt

You have no control over what just happened

What happens next will be determined by how you react

You curse

You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over

She breaks down in tears

After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table.

A short verbal battle follows

You storm upstairs and change your shirt

Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and could not get ready for school

She misses the bus

Your spouse must leave immediately for work

You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school

Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit

After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school

Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye

After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase

Your day has started terrible

As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse

You look forward to coming home

When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter

Why?

Because of how you reacted in the morning

Why did you have a bad day

A) Did the coffee cause it
B) Did your daughter cause it
C) Did the policeman cause it
D) Did you cause it

The answer is “D"

You had no control over what happened with the coffee

How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day

Here is what could have and should have happened

Coffee splashes over you

Your daughter is about to cry

You gently say, "Its ok honey, you just need to be more careful next time"

Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs

After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus

She turns and waves

You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff

Your boss comments on how good the day you are having

Notice the difference

Two different scenarios

Both started the same

Both ended different

Why?

Because of how you REACTED

You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens

The other 90% was determined by your reaction

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle

If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge

Let the attack roll off like water on glass

You don't have to let the negative comment affect you

React properly and it will not ruin your day

A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend or dear one /being fired/getting stressed out etc

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic

Do you lose your temper?

Pound on the steering wheel?

Do you curse?

Does your blood pressure skyrocket?

Do you try and bump them?

WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work?

Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it

You are told you lost your job

Why lose sleep and get irritated?

It will work out

Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job

The plane is late;
it is going to mangle your schedule for the day

Why take outpour frustration on the flight attendant?

She has no control over what is going on

Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger

Why get stressed out?

It will just make things worse

Now you know the 90-10 principle

Apply it and you will be amazed at the results

You will lose nothing if you try it

The 90-10 principle is incredible

Very few know and apply this principle.

The result?

Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache

We all must understand and apply the 90/10 principle


Wishing you most & MORE....

The Abilene Paradox

On my birthday a couple of years back, I wanted to take my family out for dinner. I asked my wife where we can go. Knowing that I like Gujarati food, she immediately said: “Let’s go to Agashiye - The Terrace Restaurant.”

My son and daughter both nodded in agreement. On return my son said: “I wish Pappa had taken us to Mainland China – he loves Chinese food.” “Or at least to Shere-E-Punjab for the wonderful tandoori chicken” added my daughter. “Yes, I too would have loved to go Mainland China”, I said.

My wife looked surprised: “But didn’t we all unanimously agree to go to Agashiye,” she asked.

I said sheepishly “I didn’t want you to feel bad.” And both my children nodded in agreement. Here were four people who of their own volition would not have gone to ‘Agashiye - The Terrace Restaurant, but collectively agreed to go there.

This also happens in the corporate world. This is the Abilene Paradox. Prof. Jerry Harvey calls it *“The Inability to Manage Agreement”.*

*The Abilene Paradox occurs when a group of people collectively decide on a course of action that is contrary to the preferences of most of the individuals in the group.*

Prof. Harvey states in his paper ‘The Abilene Paradox’: *“Organizations frequently take actions in contradiction to what they really want to do and therefore defeat the very purpose they are trying to achieve”.* This is the _inability to manage agreement._

He adds: *“The inability to manage agreement, not the inability to manage conflict, is the essential symptom that defines organizations caught in the web of the Abilene Paradox.”*

In the corporate world, when the top boss throws an idea, the group immediately agrees. This is because everyone in the group thinks he would look stupid if he disagrees.  Standing out as a lone voice is very embarrassing. This leads the group to decide on ‘yes’ when ‘no’ would have been the personal (and the correct) response of the majority.

I love this from _Ayn Rand_: *“If we have an endless number of individual minds who are weak, meek, submissive and impotent – who renounce their creative supremacy for the sake of the “whole” and accept humbly the ‘whole’s verdict’ – we don’t get a collective super-brain. We get only the weak, meek, submissive and impotent collection of minds.”*