Saturday, October 31, 2009

यमराज का इस्तीफा...!!

!!!...यमराज का इस्तीफा...!!!

एक दिन यमदेव ने दे दिया अपना इस्तीफा।

मच गया हाहाकार, बिगड़ गया सब संतुलन,

करने के लिए स्थिति का आकलन,

इन्द्र देव ने देवताओं की आपात सभा बुलाई
और फिर यमराज को कॉल लगाई।

'डायल किया गया नंबर कृपया जाँच लें'
कि आवाज तब सुनाई।

नये-नये ऑफ़र देखकर नम्बर बदलने की
यमराज की इस आदत पर इन्द्रदेव को खुन्दक आई,

पर मामले की नाजुकता को देखकर,
मन की बात उन्होने मन में ही दबाई।
किसी तरह यमराज का नया नंबर मिला,
फिर से फोन लगाया गया तो
'तुझसे है मेरा नाता पुराना कोई'

का मोबाईल ने कॉलर टयून सुनाया।


सुन-सुन कर ये सब बोर हो गये
ऐसा लगा शायद यमराज जी सो गये।

तहकीकात करने पर पता लगा,
यमदेव पृथ्वीलोक में रोमिंग पे हैं,
शायद इसलिए, नहीं दे रहे हैं
हमारी कॉल पे ध्यान, क्योंकि बिल भरने
में निकल जाती है उनकी भी जान।

अन्त में किसी तरह यमराज
हुये इन्द्र के दरबार में पेश,
इन्द्रदेव ने तब पूछा-यम
क्या है ये इस्तीफे का केस?

यमराज जी तब मुँह खोले
और बोले-

हे इंद्रदेव।
'मल्टीप्लैक्स' में जब भी जाता हूँ,
'भैंसे' की पार्किंग न होने की वजह से
बिन फिल्म देखे, ही लौट के आता हूँ।

'बरिस्ता' और 'मैकडोन्लड'
वाले तो देखते ही देखते इज्जत उतार
देते हैं और सबके सामने ही
ढ़ाबे में जाकर खाने-की सलाह दे देते हैं।

मौत के अपने काम पर जब
पृथ्वीलोक जाता हूँ
'भैंसे' पर मुझे देखकर पृथ्वीवासी
भी हँसते हैं | और कार न होने के ताने कसते हैं।

भैंसे पर बै�¤ े-बै�¤ े झटके बड़े रहे हैं
वायुमार्ग में भी अब ट्रैफिक बढ़ रहे हैं।
रफ्तार की इस दुनिया का मैं भैंसे से
कैसे करूँगा पीछा। आप कुछ समझ रहे हो

या कुछ और दूँ शिक्षा।

और तो और, 

देखो रम्भा के पास है 'टोयटा'
और उर्वशी को है आपने 'एसेन्ट' दिया,
फिर मेरे साथ ये अन्याय क्यों किया? 


हे इन्द्रदेव।
मेरे इस दु:ख को समझो और
चार पहिए की जगह चार पैरों वाला
दिया है कह कर अब मुझे न
बहलाओ, और जल्दी से
'मर्सिडीज़' मुझे दिलाओ।
वरना मेरा इस्तीफा अपने साथ
ही लेकर जाओ। और मौत का ये काम
अब किसी और से करवाओ। 

Triple Filter Test

One day an acquaintance came to meet Chanakya and said to him excitedly ," do you know what I just heard about your friend ?"

" Just wait a while", Chanakya replied." Before you tell me anything I would like you to go through a little test which I call the triple filter test".

" What's that?" asked the acquaintance.

" I will tell you", Chanakya said." Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you are going to say. That is why I call it the Triple filter test. The first filter is 'Truth.' Are you sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No", the man said." Actually, I just heard about it."

"All right", said Chanakya." So you don't really know if it is true or not. Now lets us try the second Filter, the filter of 'Goodness'. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"

"No, on the contrary.."

"So", Chanakya continued," You wanted to tell me something bad about him but you are not certain it is true. You may still pass the test because there is one filter left; the filter of 'Usefulness'. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really..."

" Well", Continued Chanakya," If you want to tell me what may not be true and is neither good nor useful, why tell it to me at all?"



He who repeats the ill he hears of another is the true slanderer

Sunday, October 25, 2009

[common friends] The Dreamer

 

CAPRICORN The Go-Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious.... Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want.
AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality. 
PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20)
Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative.. May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Don't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful..
ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19)
Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic.. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse. (Easily angered.) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.
TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20)
Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings who are stable and secure in their w ays. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard -- passionate. Expresses themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulges themselves often. Very generous.
GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20)
Smart and witty.. Outgoing , very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable but needs to express them selves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips.. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally.
CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22)
Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic.
LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22)
Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundari es. Tend to take over everything. Bossy.... Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving.. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.
VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful Easy to talk to. Hard t o please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.
LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22)
Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.
SCORPIO - The Intense One (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can beco me obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional.
SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). I ndulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside.


| Ashwin Nagar | FCA and SAP-FICO\SEM-BCS |
Success is not permanent and failure is not final
Ph: India: +91-98330-15352  US: +1-323-325-4111

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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

If Ramayana was on facebook... Interesting

Check out this SlideShare Presentation:

Confidence

What is confidence????

A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told that
the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature
pilotless technology: It is an uncrewed aircraft. Each one of the CEOs is
then told, privately, that their company's software is running the
aircraft's automatic pilot system. Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the
aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.

One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed. Asked why
he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight,

he replies :

"If it is the same software that is developed by my company's IT systems department, this plane won't even take off." !!!!

That is called Confidence!!!

Monday, October 12, 2009

[common friends] Beware

 

Please read its a good one
 
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their 
cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. 
 
After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man, 
That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing 
left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and 
be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days". 
 
Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely! 
"This must be a sign from God!" 
 
The woman continued, "and look at this, here's another miracle. My car is 
completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants 
us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." 
 
Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, 
opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. 
 
The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands 
it back to the man. 
 
The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" 
 
The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police . . .

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Saturday, October 10, 2009

IT for Hindus

Who in the world thought of this?

 
·         Brahma : Systems Installation
·         Vishnu : Systems Support
·         Lakshmi : Finance and Accounts consultant
·         Shiva : DBA (crash specialist)
·         Ganesh : Documentation specialist
·         Narada : Data Transfer
·         Brihaspathi : Chief Information Officer.
·         Yama : ReOrganisation Consultant
·         ChitraGupta : Personnel Records
·         Apsaras : Downloadable Viruses
·         Devas : Y2k Programmers
·         Surya : Solaris administrator
·         Rakshasas : In house Hackers
·         Ram : Hardware Support - single user specialist
·         Lakshman : Support software and Backup
·         Ravan : Internet Explorer - WWW
·         Hanuman : RS6000
·         Vali : Windows 98
·         Sugreeva : Win 95
·         Angadh : Win 3.1
·         Jambhuvan : DOS
·         Vishwamitra : Sr. Manager Projects
·         Hastinapur : Silicon Valley
·         Arjun : Lead Programmer (all Companies are Vying for him)
·         Abhimanyu : Trainee Programmer
·         Draupadi : Web server - free access (Shareware)
·         Bhima : MAIN FRAME
·         Duryodhan : Microsoft product written in VB
·         Shakuni : Bill Gates
·         Karna : Contract Programmer
·         Shikandi : Steve Jobbs
·         100 Kauravas: Microsoft Service Packs and patches. 

[common friends] Miracle rescue

 

What a rescue!!



| Ashwin Nagar | FCA and SAP-FICO\SEM-BCS |
Success is not permanent and failure is not final
Ph: India: +91-98330-15352  US: +1-323-325-4111

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Friday, October 02, 2009

Hanuman Chalisa

JAI HANUMAN GYAN GUN SAGAR JAI KAPISH TUHI LOK UJAGAR"



Shree Guru Charan Saroj Raj, Nij Man Mukar Sudhari,
Barnau Raghuvar Bimal Jasu, Jo dayaku Phal Chari


With the dust of Guru's Lotus feet, I clean the mirror of my mind and then
narrate the sacred glory of Sri Ram Chandra, The Supereme among the Raghu
dynasty. The giver of the four attainments of life.


Budhi heen Tanu Janike, Sumirow, Pavan Kumar,
Bal Buddhi Vidya Dehu Mohi, Harahu Kalesh Bikaar


Knowing myself to be ignorent, I urge you, O Hanuman, The son of Pavan! O
Lord! kindly Bestow on me strength, wisdom and knowledge, removing all my
miseries and blemishes.


Jai Hanuman Gyan Guna Sagar
Jai Kipis Tihun Lok Ujgaar


Victory of Thee, O Hanuman, Ocean of wisdom and virtue, victory to the Lord of
monkeys who is well known in all the three worlds


Ramdoot Atulit Bal Dhamaa,
Anjani Putra Pavansut naamaa.


You, the Divine messager of Ram and repository of immeasurable strength, are also
known as Anjaniputra and known as the son of the wind - Pavanputra.


Mahebeer Bikram Bajrangi,
Kumati Nivaar Sumati Ke Sangi.


Oh Hanumanji! You are valiant and brave, with a body like lightening. You are the
dispeller of darkness of evil thoughts and companion of good sense and wisdom.


Kanchan Baran Biraaj Subesaa,
Kanan kundal kunchit kesa.


Shri Hanumanji's physique is golden coloured. His dress is pretty, wearing
'Kundals' ear-rings and his hairs are long and curly.


Hath Bajra Aur Dhvaja Birjai,
Kandhe Moonj Janeu saage.


Shri Hanumanji is holding in one hand a lighting bolt and in the other a banner
with sacred thread across his shoulder.


Shankar Suvna Kesari Nandan,
Tej Pratap Maha Jag Vandan.


Oh Hanumanji! You are the emanation of 'SHIVA' and you delight Shri Keshri.
Being ever effulgent, you and hold vast sway over the universe.. The entire
world proptiates. You are adorable of all.


Vidyavaan Guni Ati Chatur,
Ram Kaj Karibe Ko Atur


Oh! Shri Hanumanji! You are the repository learning, virtuous, very wise and
highly keen to do the work of Shri Ram,

Prabhu Charittra Sunibe Ko Rasiya,
Ram Lakhan Sita man basyia.


You are intensely greedy for listening to the naration of Lord Ram's lifestory and
revel on its enjoyment. You ever dwell in the hearts of Shri Ram-Sita and Shri Lakshman.

Sukshma roop Dhari Siyahi Dikhwana,
Bikat roop Dhari Lank Jarawa


You appeared beofre Sita in a diminutive form and spoke to her, while you
assumed an awesome form and struck terror by setting Lanka on fire.


Bhim roop Dhari Asur Sanhare,
Ramchandra Ke kaaj Savare.


He, with his terrible form, killed demons in Lanka and performed all acts of Shri
Ram.

Laye Sajivan Lakhan Jiyaye,
Shri Raghubir harashi
ur laye.

When Hanumanji made Lakshman alive after bringing 'Sanjivni herb' Shri Ram
took him in his deep embrace, his heart full of joy.


Raghupati Kinhi Bahut Badaai,
Tum Mama Priya Bharat Sam Bahi.


Shri Ram lustily extolled Hanumanji's excellence and remarked, "you are as dear
to me as my own brother Bharat"


Sahastra Badan Tumharo Jas Gaave,
Asa kahi Shripati Kanth Laagave.


Shri Ram embraced Hanumanji saying:
"Let the thousand - tongued sheshnaag sing your glories"


Sankadik Brahmadi Muneesa,
Narad Sarad Sahit Aheesa


Sanak and the sages, saints. Lord Brahma, the great hermits Narad and
Goddess Saraswati along with Sheshnag the cosmic serpent, fail to sing the
glories of Hanumanji exactly


Jam Kuber Digpal Jahan Te,
Kabi Kabid Kahin Sake Kahan Te


What to talk of denizens of the earth like poets and scholars ones etc even Gods
like Yamraj, Kuber, and Digpal fail to narrate Hanman's greatness in toto.


Tum Upkar Sugrivahi Keenha,
Ram Miali Rajpad Deenha


Hanumanji! You rendered a great service for Sugriva, It were you who united
him with SHRI RAM and installed him on the Royal Throne.


Tumharo Mantro Bibhishan Maana,
Lankeshwar Bhaye Sab Jag Jaana.


By heeding your advice. Vibhushan became Lord of Lanka, which is known all
over the universe.


Juug Sahastra Jojan Par Bhaanu,
Leelyo Taahi Madhur Phal Jaanu


Hanumanji gulped, the SUN at distance of sixteen thousand miles considering
it to be a sweet fruit.


Prabhu Mudrika Meli Mukha Maaheen,
Jaladhi Langhi Gaye Acharaj Naheen.


Carrying the Lord's ring in his mouth, he went across the ocean. There is no
wonder in that.


Durgam Kaaj Jagat Ke Jeete,
Sugam Anugrah Tumhre Te Te.


Oh Hanumanji! all the difficult tasks in the world are rendered easiest by your
grace.

Ram Duware Tum Rakhavare,
Hot Na Aagya Bin Paisare.


Oh Hanumanji! You are the sentinel at the door of Ram's mercy mansion or His
divine abode. No one may enter without your permission.


Sab Sukh Lahen Tumhari Sarna,
Tum Rakshak Kaahu Ko Darnaa.


By your grace one can enjoy all happiness and one need not have any fear under
your protection.


Aapan Tej Samharo Aapei,
Tanau Lok Hank Te Kanpei


When you roar all the three worlds tremble and only you can control your might.


Bhoot Pisaach Nikat Nahi Avei,
Mahabir Jab Naam Sunavei.


Great Brave on. Hanumanji's name keeps all the Ghosts, Demons & evils spirits
away from his devotees.


Nasei Rog Hare Sab Peera,
Japat Niranter Hanumant Beera


On reciting Hanumanji's holy name regularly all the maladies perish the entire
pain disappears.


Sankat Te Hanuman Chhudavei,
Man Kram Bachan Dhyan Jo Lavei.


Those who rembember Hanumanji in thought, word and deed are well guarded
against their odds in life.


Sub Par Ram Tapasvee Raaja,
Tinke Kaaj Sakal Tum Saaja


Oh Hanumanji! You are the caretaker of even Lord Rama, who has been hailed as
the Supreme Lord and the Monarch of all those devoted in penances.


Aur Manorath Jo Koi Lave,
Soi Amit Jivan Phal Pave.


Oh Hanumanji! You fulfill the desires of those who come to you and bestow
the eternal nectar the highest fruit of life.


Charo Juung Partap Tumhara,
Hai Parsiddha Jagat Ujiyara.


Oh Hanumanji! You magnificent glory is acclaimed far and wide all through the
four ages and your fame is radianlty noted all over the cosmos.


Sadho Sant Ke Tum Rakhvare,
Asur Nikandan Ram Dulare.


Oh Hanumanji!
You are the saviour and the guardian angel of saints and sages
and destroy all the Demons, you are the seraphic darling of Shri Ram.


Ashta Siddhi Nau Nidhi Ke Data,
Asa Bar Din Janki Mata.


Hanumanji has been blessed with mother Janki to grant to any one any YOGIC
power of eight Sidhis and Nava Nidhis as per choice.

Ram Rasayan Tumhare Pasa,
Sadaa Raho Raghupati Ke Dasa.


Oh Hanumanji! You hold the essence of devotion to RAM, always remaining His
Servant.


Tumhare Bhajan Ramko Pavei.
Janam Janam Ke Dukh Bisravei...


Oh Hanumanji! through devotion to you, one comes to RAM and becames free
from suffering of several lives.


Anta Kaal Raghubar Pur Jai,
Jahan Janma Hari Bhakta Kahai.


After death he enters the eternal abode of Sri Ram and remains a devotee of
him, whenever, taking new birth on earth.


Aur Devata Chitt Na Dharai,
Hanumant Sei Sarva Sukh Karai


You need not hold any other demigod in mind. Hanumanji alone will give all
happiness.


Sankat Kate Mitey Sab Peera,
Jo Sumirei Hanumant Balbeera


Oh Powerful Hanumanji! You end the sufferings and remove all the pain from
those who remember you.


Jai Jai Jai Hanuman Gosai
Kripa Karahu Gurudev Ki Naiee


Hail-Hail-Hail- Lord Hanumanji! I beseech you Honour to bless me in the
capacity of my supreme 'GURU' (teacher).


Jo Sat Baar Paath Kar Koi,
Chhutahi Bandi Maha Sukh Hoi.


One who recites this Hanuman Chalisa one hundred times daily for one hundred
days becames free from the bondage of life and death and ejoys the highest
bliss at last.


Jo Yah Padhe Hanuman Chalisa,
Hoy Siddhi Sakhi Gaurisa


As Lord Shankar witnesses, all those who recite Hanuman Chalisa regularly are
sure to be benedicted


Tulsidas Sada Hari Chera,
Keeje Nath Hriday Mah Dera.


Tulsidas always the servant of Lord prays. "Oh my Lord! You enshrine within my
heart.!

Chopai


Pavan Tanay Sankat Haran , Mangal Murti Roop.
Ram Lakhan Sita Sahit, Hriday Basahu Sur Bhoop.


O Shri Hanuman, The Son of Pavan, Saviour The Embodiment of
blessings, reside in my heart together with Shri Ram, Laxman and Sita